Infertility Warrior: Carrie

Today on the blog I want to introduce you our infertility warrior Carrie. Carrie is the author of Blooming with Care, her blog that focuses on her story as well as many helpful articles on dealing with Infertility. Carrie is still in the process of trying to conceive We are thrilled to have her here today to tell her story and answer a few questions.

Q: Tell us a little about your infertility journey.

 My husband and I started trying for a baby six years ago, when we first got married. We tried the natural way for four years. We finally decided we needed some help and found ourselves at a fertility clinic. There we discovered that my husband has a low sperm count and we became great candidates for IVF. We did an egg retrieval and followed with a transfer right away. On my husband’s 40th birthday we found out that we were pregnant. Six weeks later we found out that this would end in a miscarriage. We geared up for transfer number two and were pregnant again. I developed Intrahepatic cholestasis of pregnancy, or ICP. And at 31 weeks we lost our daughter. I delivered our stillborn, Clementine on May 17, 2019. After many months of grieving we decided to pursue surrogacy as it is recommended that I do not become pregnant again. We are currently working with an amazing woman and are still in the early stages.

Q: What has been the hardest part?

The hardest part was losing our daughter. We felt like we had made it. We were parents. We had her, she kicked, moved, loved Lizzo and even sucked her thumb. She was a part of us. And then it was all taken away so quickly.

Q: What has been the best part?

The best part has been connecting with others in the infertile community. This group has made me feel heard and validated. I wish I would have found these people earlier. I was sad and alone with many emotions for the first few years of trying. But with these (mainly women) around I feel like there is hope. I feel like I am a part of something special.

Q: Where are you now on this journey?

Currently we have two embryos and are working with a surrogate. We feel hopeful and excited to still have the pull to keep trying.

Q: What is one question you wish people would stop asking?

I wish people would stop asking when anyone is having kids (or more kids.) It is small talk to some and the worst talk to others. It is really no ones business. I love deep questions about people’s passions and adventures. Kid talk can be boring anyways...

Q: Anything you have learned that you would like to pass along?

I have learned so much in the past few years. Finding people that love me no matter how I feel/look/ react to the world has become so much more important than before. This is especially true for finding those that know what you are going through. You'll see the world differently and it is important to connect with others while doing so. I also have learned that sitting in your pain helps you grow. It shows you who you truly are and I hope others can see themselves as love in those difficult moments. Leaning into those feelings has helped me love all of myself.

Q: Anyone or anything that has inspired you along your journey?

Women that keep going after difficult times are the strongest creatures on earth. That is why I really recommend for people to find others that have been in similar situations. Seeing how others grieve and heal lifts me up.
After losing my daughter I also think of her. I want to make her proud and live that way everyday.

Q: Any resources or other accounts you would like to share that you found helpful during or after your journey?

@InfertileAF has helped me a lot. They show that we can be infertile and strong at the same time. @Laureanandloss is another account that understands grief like I do. @Chasincreation is doing an amazing job as an inspiration, too! My therapist is also a saving grace! Highly recommend going to therapy!

Q: Where can people find out more about you (Facebook, Instagram, etc.)

I am most active on instagram @bloomingwithcare. I do have a Facebook account under the same name. And my website

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